The Royals Should Learn From Harry & Meghan
The British and American press are filled with stories about Harry and Meghan wanting to ‘go their own way’ and create a new kind of ‘Royalty’.
Towards this end, they have launched their own website: Sussexroyal.com
If you read the tabloids here in the UK, you can see that the Royal Family are outraged, though they would never use such a term; at the temerity (though they would never use such a term) that Harry and Meghan want not only to ‘go their own way’, but to become ‘financially independent’.
What that means, in a nutshell, is capitalizing on Harry’s royal connection, going to Hollywood (already in talks with Netflix, Oprah, Disney etc) and make a fortune out of it. Well, why not? It’s the American way.
Clearly Meghan took one look around the old and rather tired Buckingham Palace and said “are you kidding? I’m not going to spend the rest of my life living like this!”
Well, there’s no question that there are plenty of business deals awaiting Harry and Meghan and plenty of money to be made.
But the House of Windsor is taking this all wrong. Meghan is showing them the way. Harry’s primary source of income these days is from his father and his Cornwall Estate — you know, organic farming, land ownership and all that medieval stuff. Sure it turns a £, but peanuts compared to what they could be making.
So here’s my suggestion. The rest of the royals should take a lesson from Meghan and Harry, get hip and make some real money.
First, people always rationalize the monarchy by saying that it is a big tourist attraction. And that it is. Just take a look at the crowds that gather daily at Buckingham Palace to watch The Changing of the Guard — which is currently provided free of charge. What are you, crazy? There’s money there outside the gate. So let them in. In fact, convert the whole (very centrally located!) Buckingham Palace to KINGLAND! (Rhymes nicely with England for the TV ad jingles — ‘Coming to England, Don’t miss KingLand!!)
At KingLand you can go on exciting (and educational) rides — like the ever popular Henry VIII -Off With Her Head!!. Enjoy Real Royal Food — Like the Cheeseburger Royale (Nice movie connection there for Netflix BTW), shop the concessions, pose for selfies with the Royals Themselves (or look alike stand ins — who can tell the difference?), play interactive big screen video games in which YOU can participate (Burn The Heretics!), and lots lots more.
But that’s just the start of the fun (and money).
Let’s cut a deal with Netflix (or Apple — a bidding war!) for the biggest and baddest reality TV show ever — The Real Royals. Take the cameras inside the Real Royal Family (and their numerous hangers on and spongers). I mean, the whole Prince Andrew thing, which generated so much web traffic went down without anyone making a dime (or a pence) out of it. What were you thinking???
And that’s just the start of the potential for a Media empire. What about Love Island Royal Style? We’ll do it in Mustique where Princess Margaret had her famous affair with Roddy Lewellyn. Who will get to be Princess Margaret this week? Who will be the lucky Roddy?
You see how successful The Crown was as a Netflix series. Let me ask you. Did the Queen make a dime out of them using her story for a profit? I bet not. I mean, who is advising these people.
And let’s not forget about social media. When Kate wears a new dress and millions want to emulate her style, who profits? Ever hear of Influencer? If totally talentless Kendall Jenner can make $1 billion on Instagram, how much could Kate and William suck in?
Call Meghan! She knows how to do this properly.
The tabloids are right. It’s time for the monarchy to move into the 21st Century.
It has certainly worked for America, where a former reality TV star now sits in the White House, raking in a bloody fortune, along with his whole family.
So wise up Britain.
